40 Dont’s of Golf

1. Don’t throw clubs
2. Don’t stand in the line of sight of the person swinging/putting
3. Don’t yell curse words
4. Don’t cry
5. Don’t 6 putt
6. Don’t compare yourself to a professional
7. Don’t try too hard
8. Don’t give up either
9. Don’t get in a fight
10. Don’t try to jump anything in a golf cart
11. Don’t spank the drink girl
12. Don’t spend more time fishing for golf balls than golfing
13. Don’t hit golf balls at people
14. Don’t tee off on the wrong tee
15. Don’t let a kid beat you
16. Don’t cry if he/she does
17. Don’t take more than ten shots in a sand trap
18. Don’t pee all over the place (it happens)
19. Don’t run
20. Don’t try to hit a golf ball out of water, no matter how shallow it may be
21. Don’t swing like Charles Barkley
22. Don’t throw flag sticks like javelins
23. Don’t stomp on greens
24. Don’t give up golf after every round
25. Don’t only post your high scores to your handicaps!
26. Don’t bump music
27. Don’t play super slow when you are in front of me
28. Don’t fight an alligator, Bob Barker, or Shooter McGavin
29. Don’t smoke the grass
30. Don’t play a slice
31. Don’t make your own golf balls or clubs
32. Don’t kill anything (That’s a pretty good rule everywhere else too)
33. Don’t hit farther than your boss
34. Don’t wash another man’s balls (Again, that’s a pretty good rule everywhere else too)
35. Don’t bet with a man that has a deep brown sun tan and a two iron in his bag
36. Don’t yell when driving like some long drive competitors
37. Don’t expect people to give a crap that you got a par on hole 14
38. Don’t enter a birdy pool unless you have gotten a birdy before
39. Don’t buy $1,000 clubs to improve your score from 120 to 80
40. Don’t spend 10 minutes lining up a three foot putt, and especially don’t do it if you are going to miss anyway